My Writing: Editing Chapter 3

After editing this Chapter about three times,  I think I will keep what I wrote. But never know with me, I might read it again and decide to change a few paragraphs. Even though I looked over it and checked the spelling there maybe a few error I may have missed.

 

 

Chapter 3: Rival

The minute he left the atmosphere became very cold and misty; I knew that this was not Guinevere, but the one called Morganna, if I remember my history right. She was a witch.

Her stare gave me a cold chill, “Who are you?”

“I’m a distant cousin of Lancelot.” I said uneasy now.

“So, it seems.” she said slyly inching her way closer towards my side. However, she came to a halt as she received an electrical shock. She jumped up from her sitting position. I looked up towards her in question as she rubbed her arm, I thought I heard her hiss; however, before I could say anything more.

“Lady Guinevere, I brought thy clothing you asks for.” a young brunette teenage girl said with blue eyes that reminded me of someone I once knew.

The fake Guinevere gave me a hateful glare before turning sweet towards the girl, “Please put it over there and help Sir Lancelot’s cousin with anything she needs.”she said, “We will talk much later.”

The very thought of seeing this woman again made my skin crawl as I focus on the young girl who had to be fourteen or maybe older I was not quite sure. “I can put those on.” I said with a smile; however, there was no warmth. “What is your name?”

“Elaine.” she said, her green eyes shot me a deadly stare, “My Lancelot never mentions he had a cousin coming here.”

I stared at her in disbelief. This could not be the Lady of Shalott. I thought to

myself. I noticed she was also a very jealous at that. “I came for the wedding.” I said, taking the clothing from her. There was this foul odor of beer. No, not beer atthis time what did they call it now.

“It is ale!” A voice exclaimed in my mind.

“If you do not mind I can do this myself.”I said kindly.

“Of course, my lady.” she said bluntly, “I’ll just fix this bed.”

I ignored the teenager coldness and hurried into the dress and was aghast by how

low the front of the shirt was, I felt exposed.

The low v-cut shape shirt dipped down almost to my bosom. If that was not worse, the skirt had a long slit down the side this was not a dress for a social event. No, this was for some Tavern barmaid. I had no intention of having every man stare my

way. “Is this right?” I asked, trying to pull the cover cloth to cover the top of my chest.

A knock came at the door before she could answer and the door flung open and there stood Merlin with a small jar in hand, his eyes glance my way only for a moment.Was that a spark of interest? I thought to myself, before his face became red with fury.

“What is this?” Merlin roared out towards the girl who back a bit. Never in his years of knowing her had she ever done something so childish as this.

“The clothing for Sir Lancelot’s f..cousin.”

she said bluntly. “This is what Lady Guinevere said to bring.”

“Ah, I see.” he said, his eyes went astray to her bosoms before return to face the other brunette woman. With her long straight hair tangle up, she had looked like she just awoken from a deep sleep and this outfit had him imagining things that he should not have been. “This is not a proper outfit for a young maiden from a respectful family, nor is she a tramp in a bar, tavern, Elaine!” His blue eyes met her eyes as she back away suddenly. “Now be gone.”

I thought I saw her match his glare; I must have imagined it. She was now heading for the door.

Pig headed fool! She silently thought bitterly. “Y-yes, oh great one.” the teenage girl said with tears in her eyes and hurried out of the chamber so fast that she nearly ran into Lancelot.

“Hey, Lana waits up.” Lancelot said, puzzled, carrying clothes with a well dress

woman in the room. “Look who I found.”

“Oh, Duchess Joan, this is an honor.” Merlin said, placing a kiss on the side of her  face.

 

 I think something is about to happen here with these to characters. I wanted to make this part as tense as possible.

 

 

 

 Special Announcement

Okay, I have a very special announcement to all of who has like my posts.  My blog Firefly’s Journal has reached 500 likes, (502 as of a few hours ago) and this makes me very happy    🙂   To everyone out there a big Thank you!!!

And also to  my new followers.

 

©V.ROSE DEMET ™2014

©V.ROSE DEMET ™2014

 

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